I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
