Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
