yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Found your dick twin last night
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I came so hard my ears popped.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
