Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
