do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
