i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
