I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
