we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Come on in and take your pants off
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
