Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
