My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
