Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I got inside last night via doggy door
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
