I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
