i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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