this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
