I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
