then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
