garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Boobs speak an international language.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
