omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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