We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
