The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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