I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
