thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
