I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
These tits shall not be calmed
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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