They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
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