That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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