You're my little dorito
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm at about main and main street
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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