You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
