I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
