Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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