I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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