And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
