i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
you win again, gameday.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize