it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
