So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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