NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
