I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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