Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
