I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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