Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
