As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
