i think i recognize dicks better than faces
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
