New invention idea: vibrating tampons
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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