It's Friday. Sex?
She announced her abortion via fbk
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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