Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize