I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
