in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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