Define "chronic" masturbator.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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