I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
