My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
