We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize