You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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